Palmistry and Relationships – by Joe Nicols

Palmistry has been traced back several thousand years to pre-vedic India.

find-palmistry-at-metaphysical-life-expoI practice rational or scientific palmistry, which relates to the interpretation of the actual lines and structures in the hand, as opposed to using the palm purely as a psychic movie screen similar to “scrying” with a crystal ball. Rational palmistry covers most major areas of a person’s life, including relationships.

Where to start?

In interpreting the indicators in the palm, it is important to determine which hand is dominant, and in about 85% of folks it is the right hand. If the person is ambidextrous, I usually focus more on the one they write with, even if they perform gross motor tasks with the other hand.

Once dominance is ascertained, I examine and compare the length of the dominant hand index or pointer finger, to the length of the dominant hand ring or third finger. To continue the assessment, hold your dominant hand in front of your face with the palm toward you, and freeze your hand. If the dominant pointer appears to be the same length as the dominant ring finger, the person came out of childhood with a balance between being assertive or allowing someone else to take the lead, in other words sometimes being able to step up and take charge, and other times backing off and being able to follow. With the pointer and ring fingers the same length, the person is not really a control freak, even if others may believe that.

If the dominant pointer is shorter than the dominant ring finger, the person came out of childhood lacking confidence or not feeling quite good enough. People with this configuration usually work harder to gain confidence in themselves and their abilities and very often pair up with partners who are more naturally confident. I tell these individuals that their worth and talents are there, but they need to have courage and take action in life activities in order to prove it to themselves.

If the person’s dominant pointer is longer than the dominant ring finger, the person came out of childhood feeling confident and able to be assertive and comfortably take a leadership role. If the same person’s non-dominant, other hand ring finger is actually shorter than the non-dominant ring finger, then it suggests that the person started life with a lack of confidence and self-worth, but then had to get tougher and become a “survivor” during childhood. Upon reaching adulthood the person would then be able to be more assertive and a leader, but also potentially a “control freak.”

With many of my women clients who have the dominant pointer finger longer than the dominant ring finger, they especially can enter adulthood tending to be rescuers or fixers in relationships. Unfortunately, love is a dynamic process, so whatever vibes we put out can bring to us people who respond to those vibes.

For example, if we put out “I am a fixer or rescuer,” we can attract partners who were raised by a doting, fixing, rescuing, but possibly also a controlling or manipulative parent. So, at first the non-confident or non-assertive partner likes and is familiar with the fixing, but often eventually rebels, and then the first partner responds with, “How can you do this to me? Look what I’ve been doing for you!” But I see these two people like dogs and cats wagging their tails at each other – it means different things. The confident partner thinks they are doing a good thing, but the partner being “fixed” feels unconsciously dis-empowered and reacts. If I am reading for the confident partner in a situation like this, I usually comment that while being confident or assertive professionally is probably a good thing, in relationships being a rescuer, fixer, or being extremely assertive usually backfires.

My standard relationship recommendation for a potential fixer is you figure out what absolutely has to get done and take care of all that, then be patient and slack off if the partner doesn’t accomplish the rest of the tasks, and don’t say anything. They may still get around to it on their time schedule, and it is less likely to escalate.

Our jewelry can be telling!

While the lines in our hands tell us many things, where we wear our jewelry is also revealing for relationship purposes. Rings accent the meaning of the part of the hand where they are worn. They transmit to ourselves and others, “I am working on this,” or “This is important to me.” Rings on the dominant hand suggest more conscious awareness of the potential issues, while on the non-dominant hand the jewelry indicates that the issues are more deep, unconscious or subconscious.

A ring on the index or pointer finger reveals that the person has a fear of being out of control, which is not necessarily the same as being a control freak. A ring on the ring finger suggest a desire for commitment, the dominant ring finger for social or superficial connection, and the non-dominant for deep connection. A ring on the middle finger indicates a desire to be grounded and stable, and to do things to enhance mental/emotional balance, or to avoid activities that are destabilizing. A ring on the little finger or pinkie suggests the person is dealing with issues relating to what they feel they did or did not get from their same gender parent. For women with pinkie rings it is usually the mother figure and for men the father figure. With a ring on the thumb, the person is projecting that no matter how assertive the person is in their life in general, they have a fear that if they love someone, they may not be able to say “No.” In other words, the person is afraid they could be codependent or be in a victim role emotionally.

Of course palmistry is individual and the above indicators are general and may not all apply to any one person. But I have found them to be fairly consistent over the years. I hope you have found these insights to be interesting!

Article by Joe Nicols
Nicols’ Consultations
(512) 323-5183

Joe Nicols is a long-time teacher and offers both readings and classes on palmistry, playing card reading and intuitive development. Visit him at the next Expo to learn more!